Tag: Dragon Age

Ok but like if anyone wants to write a kanders reality tv/total drama/something au in which they get onto the show together but are hiding their relationship because they don’t want people to exploit it and also because drama, so they go on as friends. And the audience doesn’t find out they’re dating until they finally get caught on camera kissing, which is pretty early but it’s the episode Karl gets voted off on and he’s pretty chill but Anders get pissed and just starts sabotaging EVERYTHING. Like his team, the other team, the camera crew, no one is safe. But he stays on the show because he’s sneaky and the producers want to see where this goes. And then he gets paired up with Hawke for some challenge or something and at first is not having it but then Hawke is like “ok but think about what you’re doing…. and how much more we could destroy them together.”

So they just cause chaos and get back at the people who voted off Karl, and Hawke and Anders become friends and Anders tells Hawke that he’s dating Karl. But when they start spending so much time together Hawke’s love interest (idc whoever you want) gets jealous and in an attempt to convince their LI that they aren’t dating Anders, Hawke accidentally outs Anders relationship with Karl and Anders is pissed. But Hawke is like super sorry and they eventually make up but not without that hot drama.

And what happens next? Who gets kicked off? Does Anders win the competition for his boyfriend? Does Hawke get with their LI? Or does something scandalous start between Hawke and Anders? Tune in next week for more Total Drama Kirkwall

spicyshimmy:

domirine:

anders helps nathaniel to get over velanna, and the joining goblet seems more suitable than a regular wine glass (he is really broken-hearted)

THINGS ANDERS SAID THAT NIGHT

  • ‘Did she call you a pathetic worm? She called me a pathetic worm.’
  • ’…Oh, she did. She did call you…oh. Oh. And I was only joking. Trying to make you feel better.’
  • ‘Cheer up, old nose. Howe do you know ‘pathetic worm’ isn’t ‘handsome halla’ in her language?’
  • ‘Really? She actually picked up a worm and demonstrated?’
  • ’…Used you to illustrate worm, crushed the actual worm to illustrate pathetic?’
  • ‘They always crush you when they love you, I suppose.’
  • ‘So I hear, anyway.’
  • ‘Mine usually clap me in irons and kick me in the head until I stop talking.’
  • ‘Little do they know that kicking me in the head only makes me talk more, not less.’ 
  • ‘No, no, I’m sure there’s no leftover Darkspawn blood in the goblet.’
  • ‘And, I mean, just, if there was, which I’m not saying there is, but if I was so lazy as to avoid checking or simply let it slip my mind, we already know we’ve built up tolerance for the stuff, haven’t we?’
  • ‘Besides, I needed a cup with a rim big enough that you wouldn’t bonk your nose on the opposite side.’ 
  • ‘Only cup big enough was this one, unless we wanted to go straight from the barrel.’
  • ’…Oghren’s under there at the moment, though. I even checked. It’s very smelly down there.’ 
  • ‘But, on the bright side, now I know where that poor ferret went.’
  • ‘May he rest in piss–peace. Peace. That’s the one. Well, piss too, considering…’
  • ‘Your nose looks better when I’m drunk.’ 
  • ‘Why are we here again?’ 
  • ‘I’ve always loved y–uuuuuuuuusing my fireballs.’